Me #24: What it is like to be a wife?
Marine Science Lab, USM
0927
Assalamualaikum.
Alhamdulillah, our marriage is now 3 months old. Too young to understand what marriage is but can always be learned and improved.
Honestly, I never thought that I would be married at the age of 26. I always said to my mum I will only think about it after I completed my PhD. Well, Allah is indeed the best planner and he guided me until I met him. And he is the only guy I know who wished to marry me and he did it.
I am a woman who knows almost nothing about marriage and what it is like to be a wife. I did do the house chores. I did cook when I feel like it. I did love and loyal to the guy I love. So, I am not sure what else it took to make me a wife.
Until last two days. We had a serious argument about a serious matter that me myself unsure about it but because of my arrogant self and the ego in me, I keep arguing and I do not know what had happened if I continue to win that argument.
Something popped in mind. All this while, I plant in mind that marriage is a restriction for a woman like me. I love to be free and I always think that marriage restrict me from doing things I love. I always thought a wife is a slave for her husband especially when she needs to work to get extra income and at the same time prepare the house for the family. After that argument, I stop (literally stop at Petronas) and cry. Then, I start thinking back by imagining my own mother. How she would do anything for the family. I start to think the other side of marriage. The hidden message that Allah wants me to explore and learn. Indeed, I am responsible for what I am thinking. So, slowly I start to change my mind. I asked myself, why do I marry to this guy if I do not want to love him and accept him and obey him. Why do I marry this guy if I do not want to see his happy face everytime he looks at me? Why do I marry this guy if I do not plan to make him special and feel special? All the why's come out and while driving, I (think) found the answers. People are right. Love is the most powerful feeling and it did wonders. All the questions' answer is love. Because I love him. As simple as that.
I make a note to myself. Always always always keep in mind how much I love him that I want him so badly. How I really wanted to make he feels loved and cared. Maybe, that way I will learn how to be a wife, a devoted wife. May Allah keep guiding me and protect my heart from anything that can destroy this marriage. Aminn.
0927
Assalamualaikum.
Alhamdulillah, our marriage is now 3 months old. Too young to understand what marriage is but can always be learned and improved.
Honestly, I never thought that I would be married at the age of 26. I always said to my mum I will only think about it after I completed my PhD. Well, Allah is indeed the best planner and he guided me until I met him. And he is the only guy I know who wished to marry me and he did it.
I am a woman who knows almost nothing about marriage and what it is like to be a wife. I did do the house chores. I did cook when I feel like it. I did love and loyal to the guy I love. So, I am not sure what else it took to make me a wife.
Until last two days. We had a serious argument about a serious matter that me myself unsure about it but because of my arrogant self and the ego in me, I keep arguing and I do not know what had happened if I continue to win that argument.
Something popped in mind. All this while, I plant in mind that marriage is a restriction for a woman like me. I love to be free and I always think that marriage restrict me from doing things I love. I always thought a wife is a slave for her husband especially when she needs to work to get extra income and at the same time prepare the house for the family. After that argument, I stop (literally stop at Petronas) and cry. Then, I start thinking back by imagining my own mother. How she would do anything for the family. I start to think the other side of marriage. The hidden message that Allah wants me to explore and learn. Indeed, I am responsible for what I am thinking. So, slowly I start to change my mind. I asked myself, why do I marry to this guy if I do not want to love him and accept him and obey him. Why do I marry this guy if I do not want to see his happy face everytime he looks at me? Why do I marry this guy if I do not plan to make him special and feel special? All the why's come out and while driving, I (think) found the answers. People are right. Love is the most powerful feeling and it did wonders. All the questions' answer is love. Because I love him. As simple as that.
I make a note to myself. Always always always keep in mind how much I love him that I want him so badly. How I really wanted to make he feels loved and cared. Maybe, that way I will learn how to be a wife, a devoted wife. May Allah keep guiding me and protect my heart from anything that can destroy this marriage. Aminn.
